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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Lions in the office, henpecked at home

Today Maina and Mwalimu were talking about men who are lions in the office and everywhere else but meek lambs in the home. They reasoned that the loudest men are henpecked fellows at home. Mwalimu was of the opinion that men are silent at home because they want calm and peace in their marriage.

My Human Opinion

Today we are indirectly talking about nagging. Did you know that nagging is almost exclusively used by men to describe women? When women starts repeating orders it's called nagging. When men 'nag' it's called assertiveness or leadership or other such like words. Any way you look at it, both men and women nag and nagging does result in results-sometimes. Anyway, going on...

Mwalimu has a point. Sometimes the man has to sacrifice for the sack of the marriage, but I hardly doubt there will be calm and peace. As long as the wife is not happy, there will be no peace and clam. If he wants peace and calmness then he better do or not do what the wife wants. Or he better do what the Bible advices in Proverbs 25:24
Better to live on a corner of the roof
       than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.
Why ' live on a corner'? Because It is to a man's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel

It's a good idea for the woman to communicate her issue to her husband without nagging, a very good idea. Else, he will find a 'corner' to live in. Call it a bar, a casino, a mistress' apartment, an office, whatever.

And in that 'corner', he will be the Lion King.

My Biblical Opinion

Why do women nag? When they want something to be done, or not to be done. Remember Samson and nag Delilah? Judges 16:15-16
15 Then she said to him, "How can you say, 'I love you,' when you won't confide in me? This is the third time you have made a fool of me and haven't told me the secret of your great strength." 16 With such nagging she prodded him day after day until he was tired to death.
(Did you know that in the US some men who had murdered their wives said that their nagging drove them to it?)

More Proverbs for us to digest:
Proverbs 21:19: Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and ill-tempered wife.
So nagging is a clear and present danger. And the Bible advices us not to provoke each other but use kind words to cool down anger. Men are you listening?
Proverbs 15 verses 1 and 18 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger... A hot-tempered man stirs up dissension, but a patient man calms a quarrel
1 Peter 5:2 and 3: Be shepherds of God's flock that is under your care, serving as overseers—not because you must, but because you are willing, as God wants you to be; not greedy for money, but eager to serve; not lording it over those entrusted to you, but being examples to the flock.
Ephesians 6:4: Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
James 1:19-20: My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires.

We surely don't know why your wife nags. Maybe you do, most likely you don't. But God does.
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
See you tomorrow.

1 comment:

Dr. Miriam Kinai said...

Nice post.
Nice pun: "Sometimes the man has to sacrifice for the sack of the marriage"