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Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Men, is it true that who you court isn't who you marry?

Today Maina Kageni and Mwalimu Kingangi were talking about lying women. Mwalimu claimed that women are the biggest liars. Furthermore, he said that the woman a man courts is not the same woman after marriage. She meta morphs into someone else all together. As such, Mwalimu said that men get a raw deal when they get married. So our dear presenters were asking, do women change after marriage?

My Human Opinion

As alluded to yesterday, women are far much better liars than men.
Methinks because society doesn't expect them to lie—as much. (The same case as women who cheat, but that's not the topic for the day)

Anyway, forget my rumblings. Let's get scientific.

When someone lies, there is usually a pause, a hesitation, a stutter, as the lie is formulated in the head. Now, women are better communicators. They have a way with words. They are more fluent in their speech. As such, they will pause or stutter less in their speech. Lies will cunningly be infused in that speech and no one will be the wiser. That's why a woman can lie for years, and convincingly so. Besides, women can plunge themselves in fantasies much better than men can, where they can build a complete picture of the lie. (unlike men who usually leave glaring holes in their stories)

A simple answer to the question, 'Do women change after marriage' is yes, they do change. Some for better some for worse depending on your perch. Men, please realize that the wedding day (for some lucky ones it's the day after) is when you meet your real wife for the first time.
Ludwig Borne said, "A sweetheart is milk, a bride is butter and a wife is cheese."
Marriage is a life changing event for a woman. She moves out of her parent's house and has to adjust to life in her new household. May—or may not—loose her maiden name. Some give up their jobs. Some give get the drift. So it's not out of order to say that marriage does change a woman.

So did she 'lie' about her real self? Probably not. Think about it. If she is lazy and disorganized now (the very first post on this blog) she showed signs of laziness and disorganization back then. Either you didn't see it or you ignored it.

My Biblical Opinion

The Bible does not tell us who lies better nor should it. And by-the-way Eve didn't cheat Adam into eating the forbidden fruit. Though that story does suggest that women are more gullible and easily deceived. (remember the fantasy point above).

Please refer to yesterday's post for more about what the Bible says about lying.

But the conclusion of the matter is that lying is a sin and should be avoided.

Keep lie-free this Wednesday evening. See you tomorrow.


Mumbua said...

Eve did not have to decieve Adam. When she presented the fruit to him Adam saw that nothing had happened. Remember it was that if you ate the fruit you die. so since nothing had happened to Eve he ate it. The bible says that when he ate the fruit their eyes were opened. So Eve did not decieve him. It is classic human nature you see someone playing with fire you decide to try it because you saw that they did not get burned then you burn and say that it is their fault you got burned. We never want to spend the extra time to find out why did this not happen to them because they should be hurt but they are not?

Jaffery said...

Mumbua, you are very right that we usually don't bother to see beyond what we can 'see'.

Proverbs does warn us against envying the wicked who 'appear' to be prospering.